The Hunt for the Mythical Dishwasher
Well, Disaster Cat and her family just got back from Dublin having picked up husband and hopefully concluded part one of a long, involved journey. Otherwise known as: Buying a New Dishwasher.
Easy you might think, what could be so very hard about searching for a dishwasher that an entire web blog could be written about it? Well, if you are a North American who has moved to either Ireland or the UK, you probably already know the answer. For the rest of you, I can fill you in. Compared to US standards, most European appliances are much smaller than what we are used to. Sometimes, this can be a good thing as they are more energy efficient (when properly made) and take up less space. But most of the time, most of us ex-patriots find that dishwashers that only wash a few plates or washing machines that seem to do six shirts to be absolutely maddening. The more so if they are ill made and short lived. Which describes most of the brands available in Ireland, at least until recently. Horror stories of partly-washed dishes and unwashed large bedsheets are pretty standard fair when North American ladies get together here. Unless, the lady in question is one of those lucky few, the ones who live on a US military base (UK only, Ireland doesn't have any). These ladies can buy real, full-sized, fully functional, top loading washing machines; dryers that hold an entire sleeping bag and dishwashers that will clean pots and pans. When we visit them, we unlucky ones have been known to sneak down to the laundry room, just to watch and sigh. There are many benefits to living where we are, but full sized kitchen equipment is not one of them...
About a year ago, a rumor was born. It was first heard at a re-enactment event where a number of North American ladies found themselves talking about this problem. One of the said in a hushed tone,
"I hear that you can find full sized dishwashers at such and such a store near Dublin...," the room became completely quiet and then everyone tried to talk at once.
Where was this store, what was its name, how big were the machines, and most important of all how soon could BUY one! Well, the lady wasn't sure, but she "knew" she'd heard about them. At this point, someone else's husband remarked that he was "sure" his boss had said something about them. By the end of the evening there was a list of about three or four store, and each person was "sure" that the store they remembered, was the store that had the American sized machines. By now, all the locals were also looking at us as if we were absolutely nuts! Who could care that much about a washing machine or a dishwasher?
The Ex-Patriot Home Makers from North American, That's Who (not to mention our husbands who were pretty tired of listening to us...).
To quote my beloved, "I care absolutely nothing about dishwashers as long as we have one and it works."
For you yet to be partnered out there this is husband speak for "The only thing I know about dishwasher is when my wife is unhappy with hers, she tends to be cranky and might even ask me to wash dishes, which is a fate to be avoided at all costs!"
Our current machine, has been broken for over a year, and my husband is not a happy man. About four years ago we went and asked to buy "the best machine you have" at the largest appliance store in Dublin. It lasted about two years, sort of cleaning plates for the first year and after that leaving large amounts of soap, grit and other items on the dishes. By the third year you had to wash all the dishes before putting them into the dishwasher as nothing would be removed during the cycle. Then the wheels on the bottom basket fell off and the company wanted over a hundred euros to replace two tiny, plastic wheels. My house-mate made the basket a set of skies out of plastic tubing instead. Then one day, it just quit working. That was months ago. The space reserved for it has become a beloved den for our large dog. And our sink has dirty dishes piled up on the floor beside it. Not wishing to repeat the last buying experience, it became a quest to fined a "real" dishwasher. After all, they had to exist, as people had seen them...er...a. somewhere.
The problem was where? I called a number of shops, who all assured me that manufactures only made "one" size and that "all" dishwashers only held 12 place settings. When I asked if they would actually wash my pots and pans, I would be told I needed an "industrial model" to do that. A bit of checking showed there to be one manufacturer of these and they were the same size as the "standard" ones. Plus, they cost about 3,000 euro (I'm not making this up). Most shop assistants would cheerful tell me that "ah, there all the finest really." When asked specifics about different cycles, helpful information like "well, there's all these buttons here," would be forthcoming.
To be fair, the owner of our local shop (who is very good, and after a few years knows me and my taste for working appliances very well) tried very hard. But her small shop only carriers two brands, and there's not a lot of interest in higher end dishwashers in our rural area. She did give me some things to look for (and watch out for) for which I was grateful. And will continue to buy other items in her store, just not dishwashers. I was about to give in and get a cheap one anyway, when the rumors of full sized ones appeared.
I tracked down one friend, who is determined that her new kitchen will have only US appliances in it, if she has to import them from the US. Don't laugh, the first kitchen I had here had been furnished that way. Sent over on ship-board by a desperate previous owner. I won't even talk about the size of Irish and UK ovens, that's another story...Anyway my friend said that she had actually seen, with her own eyes, these full sized dishwashers and could hardly wait to get one.
Great, I had a store name, and a witness. Surely hope was at hand. But I don't get to Dublin often, and when I do, its generally with husband who is not really interested in dishwasher detours. What to do? Well, first I tried to get there by bus, but the shop turned out to be so far out of the city center that there was not time to make the trip. OK, a month later, convince the house-mate to drive to the store. I enter the shop, full of hope and there, right against the wall where my friend said they would be were stacks of....of...rather funny looking dishwashers? No, there are normal, regular sized dishwashers on the bottom row and on top were stacked the Clothes Dryers. Which can look a lot like dishwashers if you are in a hurry. With a sinking feeling, I find a sales clerk who informs me that:
"yes, they are clothes dryers and "no there are no American sized Dishwashers" and even if they had them they wouldn't work "because European dishwashers heat their own water and American ones don't." And by the way, if I have my heart set on the US washing machines they do sell, he suggested I forget it because they didn't sell very many as they had the same hot water problem. Great, just great....grrrrrrrr
So that use up that trip's allotment of dishwasher shopping time. I went away very sad, and worse, had to tell the other ladies that the Great American Size Dishwasher was alas a Myth. Like many myths, it probably had some basis in fact somewhere. But that where was not here.
Oh well, pause to be depressed for a few weeks and then get on the internet. Find that there is now a German company that at least is making heavy duty dishwashers that not only promise to keep working for a decade or two, they also have another new idea: An Extended Warranty! Even better: You can buy them here! I found a Dublin shop that had them listed on the web, chatted by phone to a nice sales clerk and then went to the manufacturers web site for more details.
Tonight, after confusing search leading to the wrong store first and then getting to the right store with 10 minutes to spare; armed with computer print outs, we were able to look at a machine that was almost what we wanted. My house-mate pointed out ot the nice young man, who was insisting that "this machine is the same as the other one" that the store model was rated "B" and the one I had a print out on was rated "A"....He agreed to go get a catalog and after much searching found the machine we were looking for. Its supposed to be slightly larger than normal, and will do 14 place settings. And it is rated "A."
All going well (and I hope Loki is having a great party somewhere and has lost interest in dishwashers for the moment, have some more mead OK?), we should be able to order it this week. Which means we may get it sometime this month. The we just have the next hurdle, getting it installed. Installation is another thing North American's take for granted that isn't included over here. Fortunately, we have our friend "Merlin" the Welsh Wizard, who is very good at such things. Which is a good thing; at this point I'm not about to turn down a bit of dishwasher-magic.
Meanwhile, I'd better go find my rubber gloves, there's a stack just waiting for me by the sink ...
Disaster Cat
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